The Evolution of Perspective

So they say we date at our self-esteem levels. It must be at the bottom of the level. I’m laughing to myself as I type this, but I’m very serious. I’ve never dated what I consider to be a high quality man. I’m not sure I’ve ever even attracted one. I ask myself do I consider myself to be a high quality woman. Parts of me say yes and parts of me say no. The parts of me that say yes are the parts that know that I can be sweet, caring, and nurturing. The parts of me that say yes know that I am smart, ambitious, and talented. Those parts don’t attract men to me though. Not closely anyway. Those parts attract my admirers. Those parts attract the men who want to partner with me to get work done. The parts of me that I don’t consider to be high quality are the parts of me that make their way to the surface and find my partners. These men are not transparent. They are not honest. They have very questionable levels of integrity. They are not growing at the same pace that I want to grow. Are th...

My oldest daughter comments to me that I’ve been “woke” for a long time. I studied some in my early 20s. I remember declaring that I was on a quest for knowledge when I was about 18. I started reading about Malcolm X and sifting through things to learn why it was important to appreciate my blackness. I learned about being hated and why it was important for us to understand our history and our culture. At 20 years old, I didn’t know that what I was learning would lay the groundwork for a lifetime of learning and unlearning. Twenty-one years later and I feel like I’ve come full circle and still recognize exactly how far I have to go. Being “woke” in 2015 means that I understand a lot of the ramifications of structural racism, white supremacy, and the war on black people in a way that dictates how I walk, talk, and move through my life. Being “woke” in 2015 means that I understand how the system was set up to cripple our people financially, emotionally, and psychologically.  ...