The Evolution of Perspective

*disclaimer* SO SORRY for the vagueness of this post.... So for a while now, I've been struggling hard at accepting a certain thing in my life. When I think about the situation thoroughly, it's not answers that I'm looking for. I have the answers to any question that I have about the situation. I was asked whether or not I needed closure. Because I have the answers, I'm thinking I have closure. For me, closure would be about clarification. I don't need clarification about what happened. I was more present at the time than it appeared on the outside. So I'm baffled because I don't know what it is about this situation that I can't seem to let it go and just accept that it was what it was. I thought it was control. But it doesn't feel quite like control so much. I asked myself if I was done processing it. I know I am not. I asked myself if time will improve this. I am sure it will. Is this just a case of me failing to allow time to do what it does?

*dusts my desk* I didn't even look to see when the last time I posted here was. I was feeling a certain kind of way about myself for not writing. It's not that I've been uninspired. I most certainly have been experiencing things to write about. People around me have been going through things that could prompt me to write. "The difference in your level of success depends on the consistency of forward moving and positive action.....or lack there of ."

I remember this time 10 years ago almost like it was yesterday. I was about to turn 30. I was in the process of evaluating and reevaluating my life. I wasn't satisfied with my relationship at the time. I wasn't satisfied with my job. I wasn't satisfied with many of the choices that I'd made at that point in my life. I wasn't bad off but I definitely wasn't where I thought I needed to be. I told myself emphatically that I REFUSED to walk into my 30's with the same issues I battled with in my 20's. It's been almost 10 years to the calendar year and I can definitely see how and where I have changed. I can also see how and where I have not. 2011 is almost over. When the year begins to wind down, I start reflecting (even more) on what I accomplished, what I didn't, and what I plan to do about the coming year. I did a lot. I blogged. I facilitated Rap Sessions. I hosted a Blog Talk Radio show. I networked. I helped people. I hurt people. And I watche